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Talking to kids about social injustice and discrimination

As a cultural institution and a place for children, Chicago Children’s Museum is constantly thinking about how kids understand and interact with the world around them, and how that world impacts them. Kids’ ears can pick up bits and pieces of the most complicated conversations, which in turn can prompt adult-sized questions.

Regardless of your political beliefs, these conversations can bring up questions and concerns about discrimination and fairness, and it can be challenging to know the best ways to tackle it with your kids.

We’ve put together some ideas for parents and caregivers to have meaningful conversations with children of all ages about issues of equality and diversity, and how to get those conversations started.

 

Teach them empathy.

Being able to empathize with others who are treated unfairly is an early step in understanding the damage that is done by discrimination and inequality. However, kids need to learn empathy—we’re not born with it. Parents and caregivers need to talk about what it means to empathize, encourage their kids to work toward it, and model it themselves.

Sometimes books can be great discussion tools. Stick and Stone by Beth Ferry is a great story to kick off conversations about empathy.

 

Relate larger issues to their smaller worlds.

Children may not be able to understand the details of civil rights, but they can understand why it isn’t fair to cut in line for the playground slide. Kindness and fairness are ideas that kids understand and relate to very early on. Show kids that their worlds and the world around them are related.

The book What Does It Mean To Be Kind by Rana DiOrio talks about kindness in a world that kids understand: the classroom.

 

Help them explore difference—without generalizing.

We ask kids to point out which block is red and which block is blue, but when it comes to people, we insist we’re all the same. Kids notice differences—be honest and encourage them to explore those differences in positive ways.

The book The Skin You Live In by Michael Tyler (and published by Chicago Children’s Museum) teaches kids to not only acknowledge difference, but to celebrate it too.

 

Hold yourself accountable—but not to the level of perfection.

Nobody’s perfect. We all have our own biases, and children hear what we say and take it all in. Avoid speaking in generalizations about other people and question others when they do so. If you do speak unfairly about a person or group, openly acknowledge the mistake.

 

Continue the conversation—but avoid oversharing.

Listen carefully to children’s questions and take cues about what they want to talk about. As adults, we have a tendency to provide too many details and concepts that may well be beyond their comprehension. Try using open-ended questions like “What are you curious about?” to get to the heart of their concerns. Then you can help them find more information about what they would like to know. And if you’re not sure how to start the conversation, you can always turn to books like the ones we listed above.

 

Talking about prejudice and discrimination is not something we can check off a list—it’s an ongoing conversation. Help your children see the world through a lens of compassion and kindness throughout their childhoods that will last well into their adult lives.

Field Trips and Self Identity

Museum educators Holly Denman and Alexandra Pafilis look at how field trips can provide a special platform for children as they work on developing their unique senses of self. 

Daily, we are reminded that children are individuals, growing into their potential and personality, developing their senses of self. As we watch children enter and explore Chicago Children’s Museum, we are often struck by the varying reactions, interests and temperaments of our field trip visitors. Some children eagerly burst into the nearest exhibit—passionately curious about what it could hold. Others dutifully stick close to their teacher as they look around their new setting. Some express concern about putting their lunch away, looking for reassurance that it will be waiting for them.

Field trips can be a powerful tool for fostering self-efficacy, the feeling of being a “doer” inthe world and capable of success in new situations. We love to watch feelings of self-efficacy bloom as children build structures in our Skyline exhibit. At first, children may puzzle over how to line up the wooden struts, nuts and bolts. After some tinkering, they quickly discover how to assemble the

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materials into the frame of a building. As they work with busy hands and minds, they can see the results of their actions—all of a sudden they have a house that they built! Similarly, children have a chance to work with real tools—many of which they are using for the first time—in our Tinkering Lab exhibit. When children swing a hammer for the first time, they often miss the nail completely. But on the tenth, 20th or maybe 50th time, they have the technique mastered and are driving nails into wood like a pro. The healthy pride on a child’s face at that moment is a peek into a bolstered sense of ability, efficacy and confidence.

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Talking to Your Kids About Tragedy

Like the rest of the country, we were shocked and deeply saddened by the events at the Boston Marathon this past Monday. Discussing disaster and loss with your family, especially children, can be complicated subjects to navigate. Below are resources we have reviewed and approved to help you decide when and how to talk to the children in your life about tragedy.

Talking to Kids About News
Talking with Children About Tragedy – Again
Hot to Talk to Kids About The Boston Marathon Bombing, Age by Age
Cope After Exposure to a Traumatic Event
How to Help Kids Feel Safe After a Tragedy